Skip to main content

Posts

Thirst (2015)

Welcome to Monster Movie Madness, where we take a look at flicks and films dealing with threats and things that aren’t exactly human. Hell, most of ’em aren’t human at all—and those are the really fun ones!

Do you know what it’s like to be in trouble? I don’t mean talking too loud in the library trouble, or getting caught parking in a yellow zone trouble, but the kind of trouble that sends you flying a hundred miles from civilization, where you have to set up a tent to sleep in, dig a hole to poop in, and whatever you do, avoid falling victim to the beef jerky machine from space? No? Well, you will. Put on your hiking boots and grab your tent and shovel (and some White Cloud™, if you’re of a mind), because we’re heading out into the wilds of Utah with Thirst (2015—not to be confused with Thirst [2009], a very different movie)!

I was surfing through Amazon, searching for a movie to stick up on the Monster Movie Madness wall, when I came upon this description:

“Stranded in the desert, a …
Recent posts

Saint (2010)

Welcome to Monster Movie Madness, where we take a look at flicks and films dealing with threats and things that aren’t exactly human. Hell, most of ’em aren’t human at all—and those are the really fun ones!

(Singing) “Christmas, Christmas time is here, time to run and hide in fear . . .” Happy holidays, everyone! As you may or may not know, the onset of the season of giving and brotherly love means just one thing here at Monster Movie Madness: it’s time for me to watch some holiday horror! Now I know what you’re saying: oh, God, Rob, not another Krampus movie?

No. Not another Krampus movie. I went deeper than that, to the precursor to the Krampus myth, good old Saint Nicholas! Prepare yourself for a holiday flick filled with guns, bloodshed, and very tall hats, as we take a look at Saint (2010).

Written and directed by Dick Maas.
Warning: this review may contain spoilers.

December 5, 1492
The Dutch village is small, as are the children leaving treat-filled shoes on doorsteps. The hat is…

Doom: Annihilation (2019)

Welcome to Monster Movie Madness, where we take a look at flicks and films dealing with threats and things that aren’t exactly human. Hell, most of ’em aren’t human at all—and those are the really fun ones!



I chose four films to watch this month, each of which came out on video (and to Vudu) in the USA on the same day: October 1, 2019. I've looked at a flick with star power, then the first Pakistani zombie film, and then did my first crowdfunded movie movie review, all from October 1 of this year. How can I possibly round out my Halloween reviewing experience?

Why, a horror movie based on a video game, of course! When I played the original Doom―a cutting-edge first-person-shooter back in 1993―I had no idea someday I'd be watching (never mind reviewing) a film based on the successful game series: Doom: Annihilation (2019).

Written and directed by: Tony Giglio.

Warning: this review may contain spoilers.


We begin in a top secret United Aerospace Corporation (UAC) base on Phobos, the l…

The Young Cannibals (2019)

Welcome to Monster Movie Madness, where we take a look at flicks and films dealing with threats and things that aren’t exactly human. Hell, most of ’em aren’t human at all—and those are the really fun ones!

So far in my Released in the States October 1 series, I've looked at a film that had stars backing it, and the first zombie movie to come out of Pakistan. For the third installment, I decided to go with what may be my first crowd-sourced-movie movie review: Indiegogo-funded The Young Cannibals (2019).

Besides, a cannibal film coming from a production company called Bad Taste Pictures?

Shut up and take my money!

Written and directed by: Kris Carr and Sam Fowler

Warning: this review may contain spoilers.

The action opens with three men sitting shivering in the snow. They're battered, beaten up, and have obviously survived something. Two are eating, voraciously, almost savagely; it's meat on the bone, and it's raw, and it's kind of gross. They offer some to the third…

Altered Skin (2019)

Welcome to Monster Movie Madness, where we take a look at flicks and films dealing with threats and things that aren’t exactly human. Hell, most of ’em aren’t human at all—and those are the really fun ones!
Continuing my Halloweeny peek at four films released straight to video on October 1 of this year (less than two weeks prior to this writing), I decided to watch Altered Skin (2019). I'm being straight up here: last week I started this little venture with Devil's Revenge (2019) because it starred (sort of) William Shatner (the Shat!); this weekend I appeared at both Rock & Shock and the Merrimack Valley Halloween Book Festival, so I chose Altered Skin because, at 80 minutes, it was the shortest on my list. Besides, the end of the Vudu description reads: The first film of its type to be shot on location in Karachi, Altered Skin brings a fresh cultural take to the zombie epidemic.
A horror movie with a fresh cultural take on zombies? Take my money!

Written and directed by: …

Devil's Revenge (2019)

Welcome to Monster Movie Madness, where we take a look at flicks and films dealing with threats and things that aren’t exactly human. Hell, most of ’em aren’t human at all—and those are the really fun ones!

Scrolling through Vudu the other day, hoping some recent addition to their horror catalog might catch my eye, I noticed a couple of new releases in there. Very new releases. It was October 5, and they’d both come out on October 1, of this year. Four days previously.


Hmm . . .
I scrolled through the list again, looking only at release dates, and found four films in there, all of which came out on October 1, 2019, straight to video-on-demand.
Hmm . . . I thought again. Four s-t-v horror flicks releasing on October 1 . . . four weekends in October . . . Hmm . . .
So this month, I’m checking out one of these films each weekend and throwing up a review. Straight to video tends to carry a negative stigma, but there might be a gem or two on the list, right?
Right?
Right! Here we go—beginning my…

Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse (2015)

Welcome to Monster Movie Madness, where we take a look at flicks and films dealing with threats and things that aren’t exactly human. Hell, most of ’em aren’t human at all—and those are the really fun ones!

You have your insect repellent? Good. Canteen? Okay. First aid kit? Nice. How about your pocket knife? Lighter and lighter fluid? Shotgun? Gasoline-powered weed whacker with titanium brush-cutting blades?

Excellent, ’cause we’re gonna need all that stuff as we check out Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse (2015).


Written by Carrie Evans, Emi Mochizuki, and Christopher B. Landon
Directed by Christopher B. Landon


Warning: this review may contain spoilers.

Ron the janitor (Blake Anderson), headphones cranked and mop-dancing his way around Biotine Labs after hours, makes a stop in the big room where Peter (Theo Kypri) is still hard at work, burning the Bunsen burner at both ends.

“Hey, man, mind if I mop?” Ron says. “I can come back later . . .”

“Go ahead. Just don’t touch anything.” Pet…